| My
name is Sarah Cornelius, Chief Executive of
the Joshua Foundation and more importantly,
Joshua's mother. I want to thank you for taking
the time to read our website and would like
to share with you my personal story. As with
all stories, I will start at the beginning and
while I do not under appreciate one moment of
my life, in essence my life story really begins
on May 8th 1991. For on that day,
my son Joshua was born and from the moment
he walked at 8 months I knew he was a special
child. His life was to be extraordinary, not
least because of his amazing zest and passion
for life. Joshua always took life by the horns
and he was in it for every moment; every experience.
In October 1995 Joshua and I moved to Israel
where I was a visiting doctoral student, completing
my law thesis on war crimes trials at the Hebrew
University, Jerusalem. Joshua went to a Hebrew
speaking school and spent many an afternoon
playing on the walls of the old city of Jerusalem.
We returned to the UK in the summer of 1996
and I took up post as a Lecturer in International
Criminal Law at the University of Sussex. Joshua
settled into his new school in Burgess Hill,
near where we lived and life was good. On Friday
December 20th 1996 I picked Joshua
up from his end of school party and travelled
home to my parents home in Wales. We were due
to be home for 10 days and then back to Brighton.
But, the path of destiny was at that moment
knocking on my door. On Christmas Eve a playful
five minutes changed my life forever.
Josh was lying
across my stomach and we were playing drums
on his stomach while watching TV. Suddenly I
felt a mass on his left hand side, just
under his rib cage. I mentioned it to my mother
and made the decision that after the Christmas
close down I would take him to the doctor. I
took Joshua to the doctors on December 27th
and since we were registered in Brighton we
were seen as visitors and waited for hours to
be seen by a doctor. By this time my gut reaction
as a mother had kicked in. A few days later,
after admission to hospital, a consultant
came to see me- he took me to one side and told
me quite frankly- “ Your little boy has trouble
in his tummy- most likely cancer” That was it
– my instincts were right and something was
VERY WRONG.
I cannot begin
to explain the impact of those words on my life.
You would not even begin to understand unless
you have been there. Only those of us who have
stood at that abyss know, really know and it
is a dark and painful place. There is nothing
worse than what I was to discover two weeks
later. Joshua not only had cancer, but it was
terminal. He had a very rare form of abdominal
cancer and there were no known survivors. We
were told he had nine weeks to live- so chemo
was the only option to extend his life. It was
nothing short of a nightmare. Within weeks Joshua
lost his beautiful blond hair and to add to
the woes, picked up E-Coli which got into his
central line system and on one occasion I was
called to his bedside in I.T.U. to say goodbye.
Joshua however had other ideas. From the place
where only those facing the very worse type
of nightmare find strength, Joshua fought against
the odds and we never looked back. 6 months
after diagnosis a change happened. I really
took on board that my son was going to die and
I had to make a choice. Walter Frankel, an Auschwitz
survivor once said that we cannot really chose
what happens to us in life, but we can chose
how we react to those things that happen to
us. There is the real test. BAD things happen
to everyone- and from them we can look up and
move forward or chose to give up. I chose life
and in many ways that was when I started to
live. At the moment when I knew that the most
precious thing in the world was dying, I started
to live.
The next two
years was a whirlwind of living. We lived each
and every day as if it was the last. We
travelled -We were very lucky and in the
summer of 1998, upon returning to the UK after
a holiday in California I decided to turn our
experience into something positive for others.
Joshua and I had dinner in Planet Hollywood,
London on Saturday August 1st 1998,and while
eating Joshua asked if we could bring
some of the kids from his cancer unit up to
London for a meal. An idea began to form in
my mind.
The Joshua
Foundation was born at that moment.
I returned
home and started planning. Now, anyone who knows
me will know that I do not do things by half.
I knew by now that Joshua was living on borrowed
time and that when you dream something, it is
today that you take action. Joshua spent the
summer of 1998 playing in the sunshine- riding
a bike too fast and without a care in the world.
I started organising the Joshua Foundation and
on September 5th 1998 the first trustee
meeting was held and on September 27th
the first fundraising event was held- a
5K fun run/walk where an amazing 600 turned
up and over £16,000 was raised! Joshua
was there and did the whole thing on his bike,
despite being on oral morphine by now.
The next few
weeks of my life were the worst- no matter what
ever happens to me in the future nothing will
compare to the autumn of 1998. Joshua’s treatment
had to stop- there was nothing more than could
be done and slowly Joshua deteriorated and was
eventually bed-bound. It is beyond description
to share those days but please be sure of one
thing- a child dying of cancer is not
the sweet/nice, angels fluttering over head
event that Hollywood depicts. My son lost all
his functions; went blind and died in my arms.
He was just 7 years old. The date was December
4th 1998.
To be honest,
the Joshua Foundation was my salvation. In the
aftermath of Joshua’s death I did not have time
to feel sorry for myself. After our fun run
in September I had set in motion the dream that
was Joshua’s- the meal at Planet Hollywood and
with the support of family and friend s, that
dream came true on January 16th/17th
1999. We gathered children from across the UK
who had terminal cancer and we brought them
to London for a weekend experience- a double-decker
tour of London; a river ride; a visit to the
Zoo and the high point was the limo ride to
Planet Hollywood, along with the film premier
and the meal. We had achieved Joshua’s dream.
But things
did not end there. We had captured the imagination
of people and Joshua’s story meant that every
day envelopes were arriving- donations from
people who believed that we were doing something
much needed. Then there was the hospitals- they
kept referring children to us and there was
a real need for our work. You see, by this point
we were providing holidays and experiences for
children with terminal cancer and we were, and
still are, the only UK charity that specifically
assists children with terminal cancer. There
are many worthwhile wish granting charities-
but none that knew the specific needs of children
and their families where a child has terminal
cancer. None that involved the whole family
and none that more clearly understood the importance
of these trips and experiences.
Since our
launch in September 1998, the Joshua Foundation
has assisted over 250 terminally ill children
and their families and now work with 11 of the
Paediatric Oncology Units in the UK. We also
have close working links with two overseas units-
Melbourne Children’s Hospital and Haddasah Hospital,
Jerusalem. In the same period of time that Joshua
lived a healthy life- that is 5 years, we have
raised over £1 million pounds. We now run both
individual experiences that are as varied as trips to Euro-Disney, Florida,
Copenhagen, London; we provide gifts such as
computers, digital camera’s; organise for youngsters
to meet their favourite pop and sport stars
as well as more unusual requests. One young
girl asked if she could touch an elephant and
I noted on her referral notes that she had wanted
to be a vet so we arranged for her to work at
Bristol Zoo for the day. Another girl mentioned
that she was a Chitty Chitty Bang Bang fan so
since I knew who owned the car from the film
I arranged for her to take a ride. In
addition to these individual trips we also run
two annual group trips- the first to Euro-Disney
and the most popular, our annual trips to Lapland.
We raise our
funds in a variety of ways but in all we do
we try to enrich the lives of our supporters
We hope to motivate people to make a difference
to the lives of others. This stands as the pivot
in our philosophy-charity work goes both ways-
the giver gets as much out of giving as the
receiver does from receiving.
It will be
8 years in December that my son died and while
I would change that fact if I could I know that
this is not going to happen. Joshua was the
quintessential defining moment of my life; an
incredible life force who showed me in his short
life what living is all about. His testament
far outshines the contributions made by others
who live much longer lives and in his memory
I believe that George Bernard Shaw was right
when he said the following-
“ The true
joy of life is being used for a purpose recognised
by yourself as a mighty one. It is better to
be a force of nature, instead of a feverish,
selfish little clod of ailments and grievances
complaining that the world will not devote itself
to making you happy. I am of the opinion that
my life belongs to the whole community and as
long as I live it is my privilege to do for
it whatever I can. I want to be thoroughly used
up when I die. For the harder I work the more
I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake.
Life is no brief candle to me. It’s a sort of
splendid torch which I’ve got to hold up for
the moment and I want to make it burn as brightly
as possible before handing it on to future generations.
“
It is my firm
belief that one can be empowered by crisis and
tragedy. In Joshua's memory the work of the
Joshua Foundation continues and I thank you
for taking the time to learn about our work
and Joshua's story.
Join us in
making life an experience…
Sarah Cornelius
Chief Executive
The Joshua Foundation
|
A Message from Sarah 
Holiday Home, Tenby
